Earned or Entitled???

While having dinner with good friends N & D we got into a conversation about when you should tip (i.e. for what services) & if you do tip, how much?

My whole problem with tipping is that it has become automatically expected you should tip for everything, including bad service. How then do you recognize good service?? How do you let someone know their service was sub-par??

Wikipedia defines a tip as: "a voluntary additional payment made for services rendered". Key words being 'VOLUNTARY' and 'ADDITIONAL'. So why do I feel guilt when I don't tip above the norm of matching the taxes on the meal (thank you Quebec for the high taxes).

I appreciate how hard people in the service industry work - I worked hard for the money as a waitress myself for a few years. I also appreciate when someone does their job well too! For 2010 I will work on not letting myself give into peer pressure of over tipping and will ensure the tips I give are earned and a reward for someones hard work. After all I still work hard for my money so why would I give it to someone else who didn't earn it?